I tried vestibular therapy several months ago.
I found myself feeling worse and less hopeful
My health quickly declined after that.
And then my life changed.
I searched for something to help me, anything. I used fear as my drive and still what I feared happened.
And it’s happening.
Viciously and almost out of spite.
People change…or do they become more like themselves when faced with hardship?
Seeing the strength that comes from the right people only makes us want to be stronger.
Stress worsens any condition.
Learning the true colors of those around us can take hold of us as individuals. We forget all the good.
I’ve even wondered if there is a hope in people that I don’t make it. And while that may seem like the most negative thing a person can say, it feels closer to the truth than anything else I’ve tried to see.
Trying to find peace before my surgery hasn’t been easy.
If you’ve ever dealt with an illness or condition of any kind, you may have experienced people leaving at the worse possible times.
You can understand the feeling of trying to give the benefit of the doubt and then they show you their ass and you can’t help but wonder.
I’m trying to find peace before my surgery.
I’m trying to find my hope again.
I’m trying to rewrite my plans for an amazing future after a successful surgery.
In my defeated moments, I have realized there are still people in my corner. There are still people fighting next to me and with me.
My faith has been squashed and squished in many ways over the years. It is faith that has brought me the very strong women to my corner.
These are the words I found myself repeating yesterday and it’s been circling me today. In repeat, I’ve found these words to be comforting and pulling me into a better mindset.
Prayer in the right form can be life altering. The love in these prayers from the amazing women in my life has been a different kind of healing.
So much strength all around me has only made me stronger. The right support makes all the difference!
I will not be defeated.